Commercials that offend me...

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I'm sure there are people out in the blogosphere thinking, 'really, a blog post about something that bugs this guy - yeah, I'm going to read that right away'.  Well yes, it is a post about a commercial that offends me.

I saw this commercial and was tempted to throw something at the television screen.  Well maybe not.  But my very humanity was offended by the idea that our lives are little more than a series of selfish consumer choices.  Really?  Is having a child equal with that trip to Paris?  How about choosing that 'significant other'?  No, I think I'll have the dream home... no wait, the education... no wait... I just can't decide what I want.  Idiots.

Is this what we aspire to?

[That's right folks, the blog post title was in the plural.  I might see another that offends me and post about it.  But I can't imagine ever seeing a commercial that is as offensive to the ineffably majestic potential of human life as this one.]

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One of my favourite stories: The Martyrdom of Polycarp

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Excerpt from the Martyrdom of Polycarp (155CE)

And then, as he was brought forward, there was a great uproar when they heard that Polycarp had been arrested.  Therefore, when he was brought before him, the proconsul asked if he were Polycarp.  And when he confessed that he was, the proconsul tried to persuade him to recant, saying, "Have respect for you age," and other such things as they are accustomed to say: "Swear by the genius of Caesar; repent; say, 'Away with the athiests!'"  So Polycarp solemnly looked at the whole crowd of lawless heathen who were in the stadium, motioned toward them with his hand, and then (groaning and looking up to heaven) said, "Away with the atheists!"  But when the magistrate persisted and said, "Swear the oath, and I will release you; revile Christ," Polycarp replied, "For eighty-six years I have been his servant, and he has done me no wrong. How can I blaspheme my King who saved me?"


But as he continued to insist, saying, "Swear by the genius of the Caesar," he answered: "If you vainly suppose that I will swear by the genius of Caesar, as you request, and pretend not to know who I am, listen carefully: I am a Christian...  (Martyrdom Polycarp 9.1b-10.1a)

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The Arab World: A Time of Hope?

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It is hard not to get excited.  First there was Tunisia.  Then the dramatic events in Egypt.  Now we hear of protests and public demonstrations in Yemen, Bahrain, Iran, and even Libya.  Fueled by discontent at the economic and social injustices of their various nations, first the youth, and then people of all walks of life, have risen up to let their voices be heard.  From North Africa to the Persian Gulf something seems to be in the air: freedom?

The leaders of these various nations continue to fall back on questions of safety and security as justification for not heeding the people's cry.  Yes, safety and security are real issues, real necessities for a civil society.  But can you have a civil society without a certain amount of freedom (social, political, and economic)?

I watch to new and follow along as I have time.  Indeed it is difficult not to get excited.  I continue to hope and pray for the peoples of these nations.  Is a change sweeping the Arabic world?  Will I one day be telling my children about this time?  Unlike some in the West, I don't wish for those in North Africa and the Middle East to turn into a mirror image of the West.  But I do wish for them many of the freedoms that we in the West enjoy.  I wish for their voices to be heard.

How can I not be hopeful when I see people of all ages, people of different religions and walks of life joining together in their common humanity crying out for justice.  Peaceful resistance in the face of injustice gives me hope.

Pax tibi

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Thoughts on Christian Memorial Services: Sorrow, Joy, and Hope

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I took some time to listen to the audio of a memorial service for the Pastor of a local Church, which some of our friends are a part of.  I didn't know Pastor Bill; I don't believe that I've ever met him.  But he was an important person in the lives of some of our friends so I thought I ought at least to listen to his memorial service.  It can be an amazing thing to listen to the thoughts and memories when people speak of the life of a Christian loved one who has passed on.

I remember when my Granny passed on.  I cried and cried that night in my bed.  I knew, even as I cried, that my tears were for myself.  They were because of all the missed time, of all the things I never learned from her that she surely had to teach me.  I cried for my mother and my aunt who had lost a wonderful, loving, and giving mother.  I did not cry for my Granny.  Had I cried for her they would have been wasted tears.  Where she is, there are no tears... there is only joy.  I had tears, I had hope.  But Granny has no need for such things where she is.  No tears, no hope... only blessed joy and communion with He who is love incarnate.

I also remember meeting Greta, my dear wife's mother.  Well, I didn't actually meet her in person: I met her at her memorial service through those to whom she was a mother, a wife, a sister, a friend.  I heard tales of her, stories of a beautiful woman who enriched the lives of those around her.  I saw sorrow in the eyes of those who loved her and missed her deeply.  I also saw hope.  Greta now walks in a place that we can only imagine in the vaguest of ways, a place of love, a place of joy, a place of wholeness.

There is no abiding tragedy in the death of a Christian.  There is the sorrow of losing the company of loved ones.  There are questions of why - questions we are not able to answer sufficiently in this life.  there are tears.  Tragedy?  No, there cannot truly be tragedy when we have such hope, when those who have left us are drinking deep from the well of infinite joy and love.

I have not known Pastor Bill.  I have not been a part of his church congregation.  But as I listened to his memorial service I realized that the power behind the life that he led - the life that so obviously moved and inspired those around him - is the same power that guides my life.  We worship and serve the same loving God.  Those of his congregation who feel the pain of loss are comforted with the same comfort with which all Christians are comforted: the hope of eternal life, eternal joy.

We are an Easter people... a people of hope, of life.  Even death cannot change that.  Those who have gone on, who have walked through the valley of the shadow of death, those people have a hope that is now realized.  Theirs is a hope fulfilled.

For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known.

Gloria Deo!

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Love and Sight...

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The other day my wife left me a note:

Dear Tyler,
I do love you [...] please know that I'm so proud of you, of the great man that you are!

I was quite moved by this little reminder of her love for me.  I was moved that she is proud of me.  Then I got to thinking about it: 'She doesn't really know me.  If she knew me the way I know me, she wouldn't feel very proud of me.  I'm not a great man, far from it.'

I have become very good at projecting an air of confidence.  Many years ago I decided to become confident.  I looked around me and realized that confident people made their way in the world while those who are clearly less-than-confident do not.  Yes, I walk with confidence, I talk with confidence - usually I am quite confident - but inside I am surely less-than-confident.  It is a funny thing that I've yet to figure out: I have great confidence in my abilities, but I have a low self-esteem and struggle constantly with self-doubt.  I have managed to become supremely confident and overwhelmingly self-doubting.

As I was sitting there thinking about how misplaced my dear wife's pride was, how misinformed she was about me, how little she truly knew me, as I was sitting there wallowing in my self-doubt a strange thought suddenly occurred to me: what if she was right?  What if she did know me?  What if she actually knows me better than I know myself?

I've often heard it said that people are blinded by love, that love blinds one to the faults of another.  But, if I am to be honest with myself, I must admit that my wife knows my faults.  Surely she knows my faults.  Sometimes I suspect she knows them better than I do.  If she knows my faults and is still able to say that she's proud of me and the "great man" that I am, what does that say about my appraisal of the situation?  How am I then to receive this little note?

I know my wife is intelligent. I have great respect for her - in fact I wouldn't hesitate to say that she is one of the people whom I respect most.  Having said that, can I so easily disregard her praise of me?  No, I think not.

It seems to me that, though infatuation may blind, love does not.  Love does not diminish sight, but instead allows for greater sight, greater insight.  It is indeed love that makes us capable of seeing people in any sense that at all resembles their true self.  Is it because of my wife's love for me that she is able to see my 'greatness', while not denying my 'lowness'?

Perhaps love not only allows one to see the person as they are, but as they will be.  Love does not merely view, but it interacts, it encourages and inspires, it motivates and propels. Love sees not only actuality, but also potentiality.  Hmmm...

I have been carrying this little note around for the last few days.  I get down quite easily in this stage of my studies.  I find myself battling with self-doubt more than anything when it comes to working on my thesis.  I've been pulling out this note whenever the struggle gets to be too much.  I read her words; I listen to her appraisal of me.  It is not that I merely rest in her words.  No, it is more than that.  While I make a conscious decision to listen to and trust the truth that her love enables her to see, I also resolve to prove the truth of it in my actions, to honour that love and pride.

Which voice ought we listen to: the doubting voice in our head or the loving voices of those around us?

Always trust the loving voices.  They are the ones whose eyes are guided by their hearts. They are the ones with eyes that truly see.

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Learning to Focus on the Task Set Before Me...

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Christmas time recently ended (four days ago already) and the holiday mode of being must likewise end.  I didn't accomplish very much of my studies over the holiday break.  Yes, I had intended to take a little bit of time to relax and forget (temporarily) about my studies; but that time is passed.

As I near the end of my studies, the end of a seven year post-secondary educational journey, I find it increasingly difficult to focus on the task at hand.  I find my mind wondering what life is like for the non-student.  It has been so long that I honestly cannot remember.  I imagine that it is restful.  Those who have not walked the path of a university student might laugh at my rose-coloured picture of the non-student life.  I might one day laugh at such thoughts.  But when you are on the inside, when every waking moment is time that ought to be spend in study, when the seemingly perpetual educational sword is dangling above, always ready to drop, always hurriedly fighting to make it to the next deadline... when you are on the inside... it is easy to imagine the ease of life on the outside.

Later this year, for the first time in our lives together neither my wife nor myself will be in school.  What will we do with all that free time?  We will go for walks together in the evening.  Not the all to brief walks that we take together after dinner; but long walks where we can take the time to enjoy a sunset.  We will go on dates to the movies.  We will call up friends on a whim.  Yeah, it does seem a little to rose-coloured to be realistic.  But, nonetheless, that's what it is looking like from this perspective.

But for now, I have set before me one of the greatest challenges of my life.  I have a challenge that requires my undivided focus.  It requires that I keep myself firmly planted in the task at hand.  I think I'm done shedding tears over this thesis.  I still may not be able to stand up straight for all weight that I continually carry on my shoulders.  I still may have to deal with minor (and not so minor) panic attacks.  The self-doubt, the worry, the fear... I still have these to carry with me as I complete the journey.  But, I'm definitely ready to be done.  I've accepted all of these things as part of the process (or at least as part of my process).

I suspect when I look back years from now and consider what I learned during my Graduate studies, what I learned from my thesis, it will not be the subject material that first comes to mind - it will not be any of the many thinkers that I studied or books that I read that will have provided the greatest lesson.  When I look back years from now on my time in Graduate studies it will be the process, the journey that will likely stand out to me as the greatest of lessons that I've learned.  It will be the many tears that have wet my desk, the many fears that threatened to break my will to continue... it will be the character growth that the journey required of me.

I seems to me that writing a thesis is nine parts discipline and diligence and one part intelligence.  Admittedly, this has been (continues to be) a difficult lesson for me to learn.

For now, as I struggle to learn that important lesson, I have to force myself to stay on task, to stay focused, and to stay hopeful.  When I'm done with this task, then I can begin to find out what post-university life is like.  Until then...

... back to the books for me.


Κύριε Ιησού Χριστέ, Υιέ του Θεού, ελέησόν με τον αμαρτωλόν

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Gloria In Excelsis Deo...

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...there were some shepherds staying out in the fields and keeping watch over their flock by night.  And an angel of the Lord suddenly stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them; and they were terribly frightened.
But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. "This will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

And suddenly there appeared with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,

"Glory to God in the highest,

And on earth peace among men with whom He is pleased."

As Tiny Tim would say, "God bless us, every one."
Merry Christmas my friends.

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